The decisions we make have lasting impressions on our lives and those of others. It does not matter if the decision was made on fly or after consideration. The result remains the same. So I will advise that we all make wise decisions, always pray to God for devine guidance, and heed the direction of God.
From the start you loved me. I was the apple of your eye. A breath of fresh air to your lungs. A spring to your step and a cool breeze on a hot sunny day. You loved me and I was cautious. Moving slowly and analyzing your every move.
Asking myself why. Thinking deeply about every word spoken, every touch, and every glance. Wondering what is your end game. The end game, with the final conclusion that you mean me harm. You don’t love me and are not concerned. You just want the booty, like all the. others.
Yet, after we crossed the bridge of intimacy you were still there. Watching and waiting. Taking me in. Why I ask myself. What do you want? You hold me, to tell me how you love and care for me. I shake my head because you have started to consume me. Over taking my every thought. I find myself wondering about you at the most awkward moments. Thinking of things that I can’t begin to comprehend. What are you doing to me?
Who am I? Who have a become. I wonder within myself what has changed. Why have thoughts of you taken over? Each touch brings about a change within me. Its to the point of no return. I no longer know where I end and you begin. Confusion begins to grow but your touch removes each thought. Mmmm…
From the begin there was something different about you. Your concern was for me and not yourself. Where I was weak you filled me with your strength. You saw beyond my mask into the very soul of me. You did not entertain my self doubt, pity, shame, and pain. You breathed into me a refreshing breath. A refreshing wind from the north to renew me. My lack of understanding was an avenue to begin trusting. Building a bridge, cemented and engrafted with you. You have been down for me since day 1, never giving up on the hurt little girl at the very heart of me.
Thank you, you changed the heart of me by being down for me from day 1!
We found out recently that my 9 Yr old created twitter and Snapchat accounts. To say that we were upset is a gross understatement. We found by him liking a post from dad. 😒 Its obvious that he did not think this through. The hubby immediately addressed the issue and the possible potential threats that could rise up.
However, I just could not get pass the fact that he did not ask first. Well, I can say that I do know why. He knew that we would not have agreed. Just like we did not agree to him starting a YouTube channel. He named some of his friends from school that has such accounts. Our response we OK, and we are not their parents. He knows our rules and such, but he continues to try to push the envelope. We continue to push back. So we took his phone until we decide to give it back.
I was hurrt initially because he did not come to me to discuss. Usually he wiuld have. On top of that I have not been monitoring his email account. Which I might add is synced with my phone. So there is absolutely, no excuse on my end. SMH…so in my eyes there should not have been a delay in us finding out, that is if I monitored the account regularly. I understand that he wants to be like his friends but I feel as if he is moving too fast. It seems as if he is trying be 15 instead of 9. I know when I was growing up, I always wanted to be older but now I understand to let time take its course.
A lot of the issues that he is facing and are going to face is so different from when I was growing up. All I had to worry about was my clothes, shoes, hair, and my grades. He has to be concerned with that and a plethora of other issues. Is it that we put too much pressure on him? Nah…I dont think so. He’s just trying to grow up before his time.
To those who has gone before us, who sacrificed themselves for us all. To the families, friends, and love ones of those hero’s, we honor you as well. Words cannot express the humbleness we have in honor of you all. Words cannot express the gratefulness and love we offer to you. Knowing that the many challenges, hardships, sacrifices, and tears are not forgotten. We stand to salute those who stood up to the call and those who stood at their side. You all are not forgotten!
Dream of dreams of ocean waves crashing
Crashing against the jaged, piercing mountain edge
Slicing through the violence without remorse
Causing pain, unmeasurable without end
Pain so deep and unblinking
Constantly circuming to the call of the deep
Never to resurface Again
Looking into the depth of the abyss